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I have honestly tried not put as many Cuaresma/Lent and Semana Santa/Holy Week photos here. I could, in theory, have a Lent/Holy Week photo each day since Ash Wednesday, but this is not a religious website: it is rather a blogumentary of La Antigua Guatemala and as such I try to cover all aspects of what is like to live in one of the most enchanting towns of the world. However, sometimes it’s impossible not to publish photos like today’s. Talk about the idiosyncrasy of Guatemalans, have you ever seen a more convincing set of Roman soldiers in your life?

This is the third year I share with you a photo of the broom-head Roman soldiers. Click the two link to Roman soldiers to see the previous images. This is what I wrote last year about the Roman soldiers of Guatemala:

So, I come out of the closet now and tell you I really find delightful the excessive garishness of the costumes of Guatemalan Roman soldiers, the clothes of the Holy Week figures, the golden-painted floats, in short, everything about the Holy Week celebrations in the villages and municipalities around La Antigua Guatemala. You may have to click on the photo above to see the fine or kitschy details of the Guatemalan-Roman soldier costumes.

Now guys, if given the opportunity, would you find an exhilarating experience to go out in public wearing a broom-head helmet, a bright-red cloak and a kitschy-looking Roman costume, wouldn’t you? Come on, live a little!

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Guatemala is a gun-crazy country. Everywhere you look there are men with guns. There are even signs forbidding to carry the naked guns inside businesses. Even delivery trucks always have a guard carrying a shotgun. No wonder Guatemala is among the most violent countries.

When you go to Héctor’s restaurant you are surely getting the freshest al dente fettucini pasta in La Antigua Guatemala. I chose fettucini alfredo; it was delicious!

With kind of sauce do you prefer for pasta dishes?

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The classic image of the old man with his “chiribisco” broom sweeping parks and streets of La Antigua Guatemala is vanishing. The Municipalidad of La Antigua Guatemala has created these new make-shift street sweepers designed for cobblestone streets.

What’s the first image that came to your mind the moment you saw today’s photograph?

I am sure this is the first time many of you see a milk delivery service like the one we have in Guatemala. Basically, two or three shepherd boys guide a herd of goats, cabras in Guatemalan Spanish, around town selling the drawn-on-the-spot glass of milk for Q5/$0.60. Some people drink the milk directly from the glass, while others boil it first.

Now, you may think these milk deliveries only occur in the rural communities of Guatemala, but as you can see in the pictures below, the shepherd boys and their sheep can be found even the Downtown Guatemala City, known as Centro Histórico. Can you imagine El Señor Presidente coming out of his bureau in the National Palace to drink some fresh milk? Only in Guatemala, I tell you!

This milk delivery approach puts a new twist of the term “fresh milk”, don’t you think?

There’s got to be as many salsa dancing schools in La Antigua Guatemala as there are Spanish-language schools. Unlike, the online Spanish tutors available from LAG, with salsa classes you must physically be in La Antigua Guatemala.

Interesting enough, Guatemala is not known as a salsa dancing Mecca and since I don’t dance it is hard for me to judge the quality of the salsa classes. One thing I do know, there plenty of venues where the salsa students take their newly acquired moves.

If you have taken dancing classes in La Antigua Guatemala, or Guatemala for the matter, can you share with us your experiences?

Here is one more entry for the Only in LAG. Leave it to the creative people of La Antigua Guatemala to produce coffee tables, literally, for a patio dining area.

The above dining patio with coffee tables can be found at Fernando’s Kaffee, an authentic Guatemalan coffee shop run by Fernando who roasts his own selection of coffee beans and prepares the best double latté in town.

Click the thumbnails below to view the details of the coffee table and double latté heart!

I believe the Muni should begin posting these signs all over town. Let licuado lovers be aware!

There are so many things that could be said about this photograph of two men, both in soldiers uniforms, even if one of them belongs to another age, another era, another place. But in a sense both of them are playing roles—today’s soldier playing one that may seem incongruous, suprising or even paradoxical, especially to those whose memories need only reach back very few years, rather than imagine back almost two thousand. And as someone who is not Guatemalan, and who doesn’t live in La Antigua Guatemala, I will let the image—or perhaps other people, speak of the complexities of history, time, and the place or role each of us play in it.

text and photo by Michele Woodey.

Surely you remember the photo of Clamping the automobiles on the No parking zone, right? Or how about the story of two police officers reporting that their patrol car was stolen, “Nos robaron la patrulla, cambio” in Guatemalan police anecdotes?

Well, it looks like there is a traffic police officer who is not taking any chances with his own motorcycle and even though he parks in the police only zone in front of the traffic police station, he feels that a clamp in the rear wheel of his motorcycle is in order, just to be sure and safe. I’m telling you, only in LAG.

Every afternoon, the homeless man above walks slowly towards this corner house in Antigua Guatemala, one block away from the Parque Central, and right at one of the doorways he brings himself down to sleep while being cuddled by the warm rays of the late afternoon sun.

Guatemala is a country of extremes. Often, extreme beauty and extreme violence can be found at the same time or at the same place or both. In a country where most of the population can not afford economical housing, houses, apartments and condos go on sale regularly for $200,000 (Q1,600,000), $300,000 (Q2,400,000) and sometimes even the one-million dollar mark (8 million Quetzales). Such is life in Guatemala where the monthly minimum wage is about Q1,700 ($212.50) and many people do not even earn the minimum wage salary.

Guatemala is among the poorest countries of the Americas with more than half of the population living in poverty. Particularly acute is the problem of inadequate housing.

Most of the population living in poverty resides in make-shift housing made of corn stalk walls, dirt floors, and roof shelters comprised of garbage materials (cardboard and plastics) and corrugated iron or wood. These living circumstances are the threat to the health and survivability of families. (source: Construcasa.org brochure)

It is sad to read introductory paragraphs like the above in most brochures put out by the ONG headquartered in beautiful Antigua Guatemala. Certainly, life can be tough in La Antigua Guatemala, chosen as top city to travel and recently declared the first digital city in Central America.

Ironically, according to ConstruCasa the cost of a basic house is approximately $3,500 (Q28,000). How many economical houses could be built with the cost of one of those houses listed in the second paragraph above? Oh, extremes I tell you!

How can I help? I am glad you asked!

One of favorite sections of the Los Angeles Times used to be Only in LA and I believe that when I started to collect some off-beat and quite outrageous images from Guatemala, I was definitely inspired by Only in LA.

With today’s image of a menu showing refacciones tí­picas (Guatemalan typical/traditional snacks) and displaying hamburger, cheese hamburger and hot dog as the options, I begin my very own category of Only in LAG; lag being the initials of La Antigua Guatemala.

Here other great shots of Only in Guatemala:

1. Desayuno Chapí­n menu (Guatemalan breakfast) which starts with huevos a la mexicana.
2. Sin inhibiciones (without inhibitions) which shows some kids naked inside the main fountain in Guatemala’s Main Square in a Sunday’s afternoon.
3. Please, leave your weapon at the entrance which shows the little handgun lockers at the entrance of bank.

No Food, No Cameras, No Guns, No Backpackers and No Private Guards inside, the sign reads. Only in Guatemala you can find this kind of signs (I think). Guns are a big trouble, you know; people do crazy things with them and not only in Guatemala; naked guns are worn in the belts like cellphones or keychains; even banks and offices have an unusual piece of furniture to deposit customers’ guns at the entrance. Certainly Guatemala is not the only gun-crazy country in the world, nevertheless, it’s sad to see signs like the one above, captured.

My condolences to the families and friends of the students who lost their lives yesterday in Illinois.